Karma and the universe dealt me an interesting hand. I landed a job working for a bridal company. Yes… Bridal. The irony is epic.
This was one day at the bridal company I will never forget:
I meet a woman today who was crying and devastated. She wanted to return her wedding dress. She had caught her finance cheating on her with her neighbor. She was crying and all the other women around her in the shop just stared and were silent. They didn’t know what to do or say. The look, the situation, the silence with people surrounding you… it was all too familiar. I could feel her pain. I could feel her loss. I could feel her hopeless. It was all too familiar.
I put my hand on her arm. I asked what could I do for her. She began crying more. All the women around us just froze.
“ Get her a Kleenex,” I said. The woman cried more. She said , “ I don’t want to even open the box. I don’t know what I am going to do. “ I moved closer to her. I am now in a position giving her a partial hug. The women around us were still standing frozen and staring.
“ Get her some water,” I said. She pushed tears away with her Kleenex I gave her. “I don’t know what I am going to do,” she said. ” The worst part is I have been trying to have a baby with him for 5 years but SHE is the one that is now pregnant!” Even more tears came. It was all too familiar.
I said to her, “ Tell me what I can do for you. I want to help you. “. “I know you have heard the following from everyone:
You will be ok. Time heals all wounds.
You are better off.
Better you found out now.
She is his problem now.
You will be fine. It will get better.
She looked at me with surprise and shock.
I said, “ I am not going to tell you that. It’s not that it is not true. It is the last thing you want to hear. “ I said, “ You realize that as you stand here crying and caring for him, he doesn’t care. He has not given this situation or you a second thought. Your pain is real. Own it, but don’t let it destroy you. Don’t let it define you. “ Then with all the other woman in the room I said , “I don’t know how you feel but with my husband that I spent my adult life with, cheated on me, left me two days after I was laid off and hide the fact that he didn’t pay taxes 3 years. I have some idea of what you are going through.”
You could hear a pin drop in the shop.
Crap…in that moment, I realized that I had not told any one I work with about what had happened. It doesn’t define me, so all they knew was I was going through a divorce. So this beautiful stranger and I had stories that leave everyone around us dumb founded.
It was all too familiar.
I guided her back to a fitting room. I said, “ Let’s go sit. We will talk or I will listen. It is up to you. “
I took her to a fitting room. There we sat. She talked and cried. I listened. The staff found websites that she could sell her dress on. We hugged. I gave her my personal phone number and she left.
I have thought about her everyday since.